Halloween

As you may imagine, Zack is crazy about Halloween.  How could the spawn of two theater geeks fail to love a holiday that requires you to dress up and knock on the doors of perfect strangers to show off your costume and demand reward?  Oh, wait, Gabey hates Halloween.  Somehow two theater geeks spawned a child who can't stand any kind of attention and dislikes candy.  

So here's our attention-hound decked out in his costume and our shy guy sitting quietly by.

Not shy.

Manning the Trunk-or-Treat

Trick-or-Treat!

We made our rounds on Sunday night at one of the expat compounds near the American club.  The 25 houses are set up in a circle, so it was perfect for trick-or-treating.  The whole compound really got into it.  Most of the houses were decked out in decor; they even had a haunted house.  Even the couples without kids dressed up and passed out candy.  I think everyone loves a way to feel connected with traditions when holidays come around so far from home.

The gang of superheroes.   We were well protected.

He did enjoy passing out candy.  As you may have guessed, Gabey was supposed to be Batman.  Daddy enjoyed being his sidekick anyway.

I spent a ridiculous amount of time trying to find a costume that wasn't designed for hookers.  The model who wore this on amazon.com must have been a good 5" shorter than I am.  It went to her knees, but I had to wear bike shorts under it.

The carnage!! 

Another successful, fun-filled Halloween.  Another massive bag full of candy pawned off on my housekeeper.  Victory!!

Goings On

I am so far behind in blog posts!!!  One of my small people poured water all over my computer and it no longer turns on.  I have distracted Johnny with a puppy and commandeered his computer to catch up on the blogosphere.

Quite a bit has happened since I last wrote.  Since I'm tired and don't care to figure out a clever way to get all the updates in order in separate posts I will just write one long post in sections.

Section 1: Around the House

We've been a flurry of activity.  Zack had his second day of cooking.  He chose to make peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, red peppers, and protein shakes.  He had to make the bread for the sandwiches.  What a guy!

Zack learned that it feels pretty good to get that ol' paycheck!

Gabey cuddling with his puppy dog.

Leia is settling in fairly well in the family.  She's definitely coming into her own.  She's digressed a bit with potty training, but we're still working hard at it.  She's doing much better sleeping at night and she seems to be growing pretty quickly.

We spend as much time as we can at the club.  There's a great gym, an indoor play area, and a huge pool.  Gabriel will sometimes swim, but he often opts to sit in the shade and play while Zack and I swim.  The kid knows how to lounge.

We finally nailed GF/EF waffles.  We had waffles for dinner to celebrate Daddy's homecoming from Bangkok.

We also decided to experiment with GF chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream. 

It was an immense success.  The boys didn't really like, though.  Johnny and I ate *way* too much.  Next time we'll go with plain vanilla again so the boys will help us.  We will also reserve ice cream making for parties: a) because cream is expensive; b) so we don't gorge ourselves on this irresistible substance.

Gabey finds all kinds of interesting ways to lounge.  This is one of my favorites.

 

My handsome police-man-officer

 Section 2: The Bus

We had a huge event for Zack this past week.  He started riding the bus home!!!  I take him to school in the mornings and he now rides the bus home in the afternoons.  He gets home at 2:30, which is actually faster than I was able to get him home in taxis.

The welcome committee waiting for Zack's bus to arrive

He made it!  

He was just tickled pink with himself.  I cried.  I'm not talking a couple little tears I'm talking all out bawling.  I cried more than I did on his first day of school.  I think there's something wrong with me.

Section 3: A Big, Big, Big, Like-Mega-Exciting Day

We got our UAB and car on the same day!!!

In a perfect world UAB (Unaccompanied Air Baggage) is supposed to arrive within a week or two after we do.  In India our UAB took 6 weeks and here it took 8 weeks.  That is a really, really long time to wait for stuff you planned on having a couple weeks after arrival.  But it's here now and we feel a little more settled.  UAB included the rest of our clothes (yes, we've been living off 4-5 days worth of clothes for 2 months), a lot of GF baking supplies, more of the boys' toys, some very important paintings (they all arrived in one piece, Momma B!!), scrapbooking materials, piano books, and other odds and ends.

I am so, so, so, so, so, so, etc. excited to have our car.  I was sick of taxis.  Zack has named our car "Kristen"after a cute girl in his kindergarten class.

It's been tough learning to drive on the right side of the car.  The hardest part is the turn signal.  I keep turning on the wipers instead.  It's also tough to think about the left side of the car and figure out how much room you have.  It really turns you around.  I'm fine with driving on the left side of the road after 2 years in India, but I had never actually driven a right-side car before.  

We hope to really get out and explore now that we have transportation.  I'm thinking one day each week Gabey and I will go on a "Mommy and Gabey's Fabulous Adventure" day and find new places and resources.  Stay tuned for those blog posts. :)

 Section 4: Pumpkins!

We carved our Halloween pumpkin yesterday.  Zack drew the design, Daddy cut, Gabey supervised, and I took pictures.  We're a team!

Our beautiful pumpkin, whom Zack has lovingly named "Daisy."

Section 5: Date Days

Saturdays are date days.  Fitri comes at 2 p.m. to watch the boys and we have until 9 p.m. to get into whatever mischief we can concoct.  Today our mission was to find a Batman costume for Gabey since I thought I had packed his costume in UAB, but it turned out I had, in fact, packed it in HHE (the boat shipment with the rest of our stuff), which will not come until, oh, the good Lord only knows. 

Our journey led us down a very busy road from Kebayoran Baru to Cilandak.  On the way we spotted a scooter with a side car.  It pretty much made our whole day worth getting up for.

Some yummy Pho at Pacific Place mall.

Me being Asian at a 7-11 in Kemang.

Johnny bought me these dorky coffee cups in Bangkok....

Not knowing that I had bought him these dorky cups in Sheridan and packed them in UAB.

We're awesome.

And I think that catches you up on the Thurow goings-on for now.

Health

  Anyone who follows my Facebook feed or Blog post might come to the conclusion that we've been sick a lot since living overseas.  It's true, as a family we've been sick quite a bit.  In India we had a combined total of 6 bouts of Giardia, 2 shigellas, 4 cases of a horrific, unnamed gastroenteritis, several undiagnosed weeks of diarrhea, dozens of colds, croup, pneumonia, and Rotavirus A.  Since moving to  Indonesia we've had a bad chest cold for Zack and scarlet fever for Gabriel.

  On the surface it seems like we've had a really bad three years of health.  Despite these setbacks, our overall health has actually improved drastically.

   In January 2011 the whole family went gluten free.  I had been gluten free for 5 years and John had been experimenting.  For nearly two years now it's been strict gluten free for everyone.  Over the last year or so we've also been going low carb/low sugar with high fat and protein, following the spirit of the Paleo diet.  Our results have been incredible.

  I think since I've always been the most obviously sick I've seen the most improvement.  I've been GF for 7 years but I still see improvements in my health as my body continues to mend.  The low sugar, high protein intake has made my muscles far more toned and my back problems are all but eliminated.  Fibromyalgia is gone and my chronic joint pain is greatly diminished.  Migraines are down to once or twice a month instead of once or twice a day.  What's really exciting and impressive is my food list!  It used to be that the list of what I could not eat was longer than what I could eat.  Here was my old list of allergies/food intolerances"

All nuts, peanuts, grapes, all melon, all nightshades (including tomato), citrus, dairy, eggs, cinnamon, wheat, rye, barley, peppermint, bananas, chocolate, beef, pork, and shellfish.

Whew!

This is my new "Can't Eat" list:

Peanuts, grapes, eggs, cinnamon, wheat, rye, barley, peppermint.

Pretty amazing, right?  The body can come back from some real disasters and I am so thankful that mine has made such a comeback.

   Our other great comeback story is Gabriel.  Gabriel was induced for failure to thrive in the womb; he hadn't grown at all in 3 weeks.  He was 5 lbs. when we brought him home from the hospital.  Since then he's always been very far behind in growth.  From age 18 months to age 2 he did not grow at all.  He stayed at 19 pounds for nearly a year.  He had a slight growth spurt up to 21 lbs. sometime during age two, but he dropped back down to 20 quickly after.  He never had normal stools; he was either constipated or suffering diarrhea.  He vomited every time he ate.  At age 3 he wore 12 month clothes.  He was our sweet, sick little Peanut.  About 6 months after being gluten free we started to see changes. He was getting sick less often, he was starting to put on weight.  He moved up to 24 month clothes.  In the nearly 2 years he's been gluten free he's gained 10 lbs. and 6 inches.  He's gone from size 18 month clothes to 3T and he's now growing so fast I think he might actually catch up to his clothing age!
   I am so, so happy to see my baby healthy.

   We're pretty big advocates of the gluten free diet.  I've known very few people who have tried it and failed to see improvements.  John's health is much better off gluten and Zack is eczema free without it.  Give it a try!  Maybe you'll see something good, too.

Zack's Job

  We've made one of the major forays into "big kid" parenting.  Allowance!  Right now the boys have the option of doing one big extra chore each week to earn an allowance.  Gabriel has declined, but Zack is very eager to take on the job.  The boys have their "help the family" chores that are not monetarily compensated.  Zack tidies his part of the room and sets the table for dinner.  Gabriel tidies his part of the room and fills the water cups for dinner.  Easy enough for now.  Both boys seem to feel very grown up and responsible doing their chores.  

   Zack's allowance job is to plan, make a grocery list, and cook one meal each week.  Of course I really do the bulk of the work for now, helping him come up with an idea, taking him around the kitchen and explaining what needs to be done, getting the groceries, and coaching him through the cooking.  My goal is to let more and more of the real responsibility fall on him until he is adept at meal planning and cooking.  We'll eventually work budgeting into the whole affair, but that's a few years down the road.  This is so great because it teaches him all kinds of really useful lessons.  We discuss nutrition for a well-rounded meal, math in measurements, timers, and temperatures, physics (we had a discussion about liquid, solid, and gas), forward thinking, etc.  For all this work he gets (for now) Rp. 10,000 (just over 1 USD).

   Zack's meal of choice this week was pizza.  Big surprise.  He's chosen PBJs for next week.  Blech.  As Wednesday next week gets close we'll talk about how to turn that into a well-rounded meal.  I'm guessing he'll choose red peppers for a veggie as those are his favorite.

Pouring *carefully*

We learned about yeast and how it makes bread rise and that we need to "wake it up" with warm water and sugar.

We learned that it's very important to clean the kitchen as you go, so we're wiping up spills while the yeast activates.

Gabey claims he doesn't like to cook.  Yeah right. :)

Concentrating very hard on the stirring.

Covering the dough to let it rise.

Enjoying the fruits of his labor.  I don't have pictures of the dough pressing because it was too messy and I don't have pictures of putting on the toppings because Zack burned his finger trying to spread the sauce. :(  He was, of course, holding a spoon full of tomato sauce when said finger was burned.  Guess what ended up all over the kitchen?

Cooking with kids really is not my favorite thing.  The kitchen is my sacred domain.  It's my favorite place in the house and my creation space.  But this is important.  I'm praying for grace and patience so I can teach my kids what they need to know.

Here are our little herb seedlings just starting to sprout!  Johnny got me a topsy turvy, those planters from the TV informercials, so I'm starting these little guys to put in it.  I love fresh herbs.  The boys love to water them and check to see their progress every day.

And my boys being silly with the camera.

We thought for the longest time that Zack couldn't curl his tongue, but out of the blue he figured it out.  Now I'm the only one who can't. :(

Up and Down

   Living overseas I feel like an emotional basket case of roller coasting emotions, fits, mood swings, and drama.  It seems like I can go from elated to depressed and vice versa in a matter of minutes.  I know that life can be harder overseas in many ways, but I also know that life in one's native country has just as many ups and downs.  Life is not magically made perfect simply by disembarking from that airplane in Newark or San Francisco.  So what is it about life here?  Why does every high and low seem so much more dramatic?  There are probably many reasons and they are likely different for everyone, but I think these three reasons sum it up pretty well for me:

1. Familiarity
I am a creature of habit.  My Meyers-Briggs personality type is INFJ.  Although I adore a good adventure I prefer that my every day life be very well-ordered, scheduled, listed, and in all ways calm.  I like to know what's going to happen next, better yet if I'm in control of what happens next (guess what God likes to use to challenge me the most! Ha!).  That just isn't possible here.   Stateside I get some semblance of predictability just because I know the ropes.  I know all the grocery stores, how to find deals, whom to call when something breaks, etc.  Here, between the different culture, our reliance on the embassy, and language barriers while trying to explain to the plumber that, no, you don't just need to clean the faucet, the water pressure really isn't working, there is pretty much zero control or predictability over anything.  This makes failures all the more depressing, but successes make you feel like queen of the known universe.  "If I can get it done here, what can't I do?!"


2. Nomadism
There are no roots in this life.  As I try to plan my kids' education path, how to decorate the house, what to do with myself as the boys get older and so on, I find myself constantly stymied by the fact that I only have 1-4 years at a time to plan.  And our tour at any given post could change quickly.  If funding changes, if there's a major earthquake, if Al-Qaeda decides to blow up our Embassy we could be moved at any time.  There is just no finality to any plan (see what I mean about God and His challenges?).  So I might get all excited about a plan today and then realize that Gabey might not actually be able to start kindergarden in Indonesia because funding is uncertain after 2 years.  Roller coaster!


3. Support System
It was tough enough to be in Wyoming those first few months, 2,000 miles from my closest friends and my family; but then I could call or text anyone at any time during the day and pour out my heart and my troubles.  My bff, Heather, was always there to commiserate and validate my misery over yet another snowstorm in May or call my mom when Zack rolled over for the first time.
   On the other side of the world I do not have that luxury.  I can't call someone out of the blue because most people, including myself, don't have international coverage and it's generally midnight in Florida when the kitchen ceiling is gushing water on the kids' lunch or I find a colony of black mold in the storage closet.  Skype dates have to be scheduled and often fall through due to unreliable internet.  That mold might not seem so bad if your mom could tell you that minute about the mold in her kitchen cabinets.  Or your mother in law could crack a joke about extra seasoning on the PBJs.  Or your bestie could distract you with stories of her middle school students.  Crying alone is no fun.  
   Victories aren't as sweet either.  When I direct a taxi driver home in my host country language for the first time I want to tell everyone how cool I feel, but I'm limited to a Facebook post that they might see in 10 hours or so.


  I turn to these three reasons to help myself feel a little less insane when I'm crying over 8 weeks of waiting for UAB and the next minute chortling over spending a ridiculously low price to have mani/pedis at home.  Yes, life is a roller coaster everywhere, but here I think maybe the ups are a little higher and the lows a little deeper.
  I can tell you for certain, you know that breath drawn in before the roller coaster makes its first plunge, well that's a doozy overseas.  Maybe that's what makes the scream so much louder.

Princes Leia

   Many of you may recall that in December 2010 we impulsively adopted a Desi street dog and name him Barkley.  It was a disaster.  He was aggressive, really hard to train, and in all ways unmanageable.  After he bit Zack on the knee, a scar Zack still bears, I gave our impulse buy the boot.  We acknowledged what a terrible mistake it was and moved on with our lives.

   But since that day little Gabriel, our resident animal lover and one track, steel trap minded 4 year old, has lived on the promise that we will one day try again and get a nice puppy.  Ever since Zack started school Gabriel hasn't quite been himself.  Part of that is most definitely due to his fight with Scarlet Fever a couple weeks ago, but I think a big part has also been that he's bored and lonely without his brother.  We knew some of this boredom would be remedied once our shipment arrives with all his toys, book, crayons, paints, and schoolbooks but we weren't sure how much we could ease his loneliness.  There are no other kids close to his age on the compound during the day and it's tough to set playdates due to traffic.  We had already decided to go for a puppy this Christmas, but Gabriel's state helped us decide to move the puppy acquisition forward a bit.  This decision led to Princess Leia, our new 2 month old Yorkshire Terrier puppy.

I had spent a lot of time researching puppies this time, so as to avoid the impulse trap.  I prepared everything ahead of time, from a bed and kennel to shampoo and chew toys.  We checked Jakarta adoption centers, local pet stores, called vets, and located breeders.  We knew for sure we wanted a Yorkie because of their size and even-keeled temperament.  Breeders were the definite winner as far as price, treatment of the dogs, and quality.  It was a long drive to the breeder's house, so I opted to go on a Saturday morning to beat the legendary Jakarta traffic.

 I went by myself and John took the boys to the American Club for the morning.  I had to pick between to sister Yorkies and it was heartbreaking to separate them.  When I put my hand out to be sniffed for inspection one of the girls crawled into my hand to be held.  It was a pretty easy decision.  She was also the runt and I am a total sucker for tiny, fluffy creatures.  I had a nice, collapsable portable kennel for taking her home and I was glad you couldn't see her through it, because I wasn't sure any of the Muslim taxi drivers would take me home if they saw her.  Dogs are unclean.  We got a taxi and she snuggled against my arm through the mesh of her crate and fell asleep.

The boys were still gone when I got home, so I was able to get her quietly settled.  She instantly thought I was her mom and cried if I left the room.  She follows me everywhere.  When the boys got home we led them quietly upstairs and they got to meet their puppy.  Gabriel has been awash in a sea of bliss ever since.  I was exhausted after the long taxi rides; the breeder's house also got mosquito bombed while I was there and I had a bad reaction to the pesticide, so after we all got settled both Leia and I curled up on the bed and took a nap.  Thus far she will only sleep if she's curled up next to me.  We'll see how tonight goes in her kennel.

Both boys are surprisingly good with her.  They love to run around the kitchen table while she chases them and they love to hold her in their laps.

She loves to lick faces.

Have you ever seen a more content little face?

I've had serious baby fever the last couple months, but since we're really happy with having our two little men, this little girl is a great compromise.

Welcome to the family, Princess Leia!  You're a welcome addition to the Thurow litter.

Humbled

   I've always hated it when people gave speeches after accepting some award or lofty position and babbled the cliche "I'm so humbled."  Most of the time you can tell they're not humbled at all.  Aside from the insincerity from most speakers who parrot out that line, I just didn't get it.  Why would someone feel humbled by a great honor or responsibility?  Well, now that I'm a mom I get it.

It all became clear the first time I quieted my baby simply by touching his face.  It becomes clearer every day as I raise my young children.  In my two little boys I have the greatest responsibilities a human being could possibly have.  I am in charge of the physical, spiritual and emotional health and well-being of two other humans.  My own two little humans to make or break.  The responsibility is incredible.  But it's the power that's even more incredible and, yes, humbling.  My kids signal to me every day just how much power I have.  They show me every time their stressed, tense bodies relax in my arms.  They tell me every time the slightest touch of my hands stops their tears.  They run to me when a stranger scares them.  They call for me when they have nightmares.  They don't just believe, they *know* that Mommy can beat up any bad guy, chase away monsters, heal any ouchie, calm any fear, and bring light to any dark place.  No matter what evil comes their way Mommy can destroy it just by being close.  Why is this incredible super power so humbling?

   Because they are wrong.  Despite their incredible faith, I *know* that even though I would fight until my body gave out, strain to protect them with my last breath, there is way too much in this world that can hurt my children, way too many things that could break their hearts and bruise their bodies.  I would die before I let anything truly hurt my children, but I'm only a human, too.  Nothing makes you realize your limitations like having another person put complete faith in you.

   Thank God I'm not alone.  I have another "superhero" to back me up.  Super Daddy is utterly invincible in the eyes of his children.  But even more important I have a God who really is perfect.  He really can chase all the evil away.  I am so thankful that when I am feeling the most humbled, the most vulnerable as a mother, I can ask God to fill in the gaps, to give my kids the strength I don't have.

It's good to be humbled.  I'm not perfect and I'm glad I don't have to be.  Still, I'm really enjoying having two little guys rest their head on my shoulder and know everything is all right.  And it is.

Grocery Day

Thursdays are grocery days.  One of the things we love about Jakarta is that they actually have real grocery stores here!  Not only are there grocery stores, there are several different chains.  We're in awe. We're really having to change our perspective regarding Asia, because it's becoming obvious after visiting Hong Kong, Bangkok, and Jakarta that India, Nepal, and Sri Lanka may not be representative of the majority of the countries in the continent.  So far I've been in Carrefour, LotteMart, Food Hall, and Grand Lucky.  I haven't even been in the other two major chains yet, Giant and Hero.  Thus far Grand Lucky has been my store of choice.  Gabriel loves to go shopping with me because he gets to visit the seafood section.  It's full of live fish and bins of various sea creatures:

Here we have a selection of various prawns as well as some squid, octopus, and crabs.

Errands seem to make Gabey very tired but he also really seems to love to get out and explore a bit.  We take taxis sometimes, but we do quite a bit of walking.  We walk to Grand Lucky from Zack's school and we walk to the mall near our house.  He loves to see new things, but I usual carry him if we have to pass a group of people.  He really, really hates the attention he gets.  I just try to walk past quickly with as little drama/trauma as possible.  I will never understand the cultural difference that makes people think they can just reach out and touch a child's face.  This has happened to us in India, Nepal, Hong Kong, and Indonesia.  This has never happened in America or Europe.  In European airports they actually get down at the boys' level and explain to them what they're doing to their bags and why they have to go through the security screen.  In American airports they tend to be pretty helpful and gentle with the kids.  No one in the West ever touches them without some kind of permission.  It's obviously cultural.  I don't think I'll ever get used to that one.

Bonus Pic: All my adorable boys being their adorable selves all cosy with their iPods before bed.