Arachnophobia

I have killed three large spiders in the last twelve hours, not counting the imaginary dream spider that woke me up last night and scared Johnny out of his wits by making me scream. The primary trouble with old houses is the vermin. I would rather have mice than spiders, but I would rather have spiders than bedbugs. Too bad it's not up to me.


Last night was mostly sleepless due to contractions. I went to the doctor today in great pain and was sent home with no progress. That's fine with me; I really don't want to have a baby after a sleepless night. I blame the Chinese and their hidden gluten! Something I ate at the buffet last night must have contained that evil protein and set off the contractions. I've been banished to bed for the afternoon in hopes of easing the terrible pressure that Baby's head is putting on my hips.


We've been looking at job opportunities in Britain and Australia. The hope is to leave the United Socialist States of America before they close the borders. It's sad when England is a breath away from being economically freer than America. The actions of the past couple days have spelled the greatest nationalization project in the history of the world. Impressive, Comrade Bush.


Dinner with the inlaws tonight, then, maybe, some sleep.