These Are Always Fun...

2008
1- Did you kiss anyone?
Yes.
2- Did you date anyone?
Does my husband count?
3- Are you going to kiss someone when the ball drops?
Definitely.
4- Did you lose any friends?
No.
5- Did you gain any friends?
Yes.
6- Did you do something new?
Yes! I got to go sledding!
7- Did anyone important to you die?
Yes. My Grandmother died of Alzheimers
8- Did you change?
Inevitably.
9- Are you happy with the year over all?
Oh, yes.
10- What's the best thing that happened to you?
My son, Gabriel, was born.
11- Did you fall in or out of love?
I fell deeper in love with my perfect Johnny.
12- Are you happy the years almost over?
Yes and no; life is shooting by too fast, but it's so fun.
13- Are you going to change something about yourself next year?
I don't know.
14- Do you think 2009 will be a better year then 2008?
Each year seems to get better and better.
20- Did you go on a summer vacation?
Yes. I went home!! :)
22- Did you get into a fight?
Yes.
23- Did you leave the country
Nope.
24- Did you have a good birthday?
Yes! I had gluten-free pizza
25- Did anyone in your family get married?
Nope.
26- Do you think you grew?
Most definitely
27- Did you dye your hair?
No
28- Who do you think you were on the phone with the most?
Heather
29- Did anyone sing to you?
Yes
30- Did you sing to anyone?
I sing to my little ones every day
31- Did anyone tell you they loved you?
Yes. :)
32- Did you ever go to the hospital?
Oh yeah.
33- What did you drink and eat the most?
Water and rice products
35- Did you change your profile over 10 times?!
Yes
36- Did you change your default at least 20 times?
No
37- Did you get a tattoo?
No.
38- Did you vote?
Yes
39- Are you going to make a new years resolution ?
Probably not
41- Think you’ll date someone in 2009?
Just my favorite guy.
42- Where will you be when the ball drops?
Ft. Collins, CO with my love.
43- Do you think you will make new friends in 2009?
Yes.
44- Are you hoping to meet someone special in 2009?
Special in what way?
45- How do you feel, another year has passed you by?
Content

Happy New Years!!

Bandit

Zachary wins the official Christmas haul award. The kid made out like a bandit. He even got a raccoon shirt that says "Bandit." His loot included:

a tent
baby cell phone
baby laptop
baby remote control
new outfit
Elmo robot
stacking blocks
5 books
2 hippos
2 sleds
candy he's not allowed to eat
various stocking odds and ends

He also plays with Gabey's little gifts, since Peanut Butter couldn't care less. For now, anyway; I anticipate brotherly warfare next Christmas.

My parents made it safely home from MD and my brothers are back in FL. Caleb is happily situated with his adorable fiancee, Too cute.

We head down to Boulder on Wednesday. I can hardly wait for malls, health food stores and decent restaurants.

C-c-cold

It's another weekend of negatives. Once again, we have not hit 0 in three days. It's hardest on Zach because he loves to go outside, but I can't let that sensitive skin get damaged.

The surprise for Johnny went over great! A friend gave us a coupon to the Best Western here in town; it included free dunner and breakfast and a free stay in the jaccuzi suite. It was so nice.

This weekend also held some tragedy. My grandma died on Saturday morning. She had been in the ICU for a couple days and my mom was there holding her hand. It's especially sad because Saturday was my parents' 28th anniversary. The rest of my family headed up to MD today. I wish I could go.

We're all set for Christmas. I can't believe how fast December has flown. We'll be in MT before we know it.

Honey, I'm home!

It's a typical day for me, the June Cleaver wanna-be. It is currently 10:00 am and I have already made the bed, cleaned the bedroom, started dinner in the crockpot, changed three diapers (including a poopey one), nursed the baby, done my French lesson and done the breakfast dishes. I would continue my 50s homemaker prowess and go clean the bathroom and primp, but I currently have a sleeping infant in one arm. That will have to be remedied, because I haven't even washed my face yet.

I had a headache all night, so I didnt sleep as deeply as I have been lately. This meant dreams, and lots of them. Each time I woke up to nurse Gabey a new dream started when I fell back asleep. The last was an entertaining story, but the first two were incredibly unpleasant. I'm glad I'm not a prophetess.

I seriously need to get ahold of Heather. I need a good, long girl-talk. Too many boys in my life! :)

Heat Wave!!

It's 7 degrees outside! Time to go swimming! HA!
Seriously though, today was the first time in three days it's been above zero. We bought an extra space heater and covered the windows with plastic. The ice on the inside of the front windows finally melted this morning (also the first time in three days).

Christmas is only 8 days away!! That doesn't even seem possible. Two weeks until 2009. In 3 days my parent will have been married for 28 years. My babies will be 3 months and 16 months. Time goes way too fast. Can you believe I'll be celebrating my 3rd wedding anniversary in 1 1/2 months?

My weekly Wal Mart trip is tomorrow. That's always an exciting event. It's a lot of fun to see how miserly I can be with my grocery shopping. $26 is my record. I save my receipts and make a game of how much I can drop my monthly expenses. I keep a neat, nerdy little notebook of all my weekly spending. Yes, I am a homeschooler.

I LOVE JOHNNY!!

Cotton Carnage

My traumatizing moment of the week took place a couple days ago and I finally have time to share it with you, my beloved readers. The saddest part of this story is the fact that it took my frazzled, baby-diminished brain to even notice the carnage right before my eyes. I could have infected my entire family with the plague.
The story begins calmly enough; I was preparing dinner for my dear family. Dinner is generally prepared on autopilot as I am constantly distracted by a million other things, like laundry, hungry infants, and toddlers trying to commit homocide by tripping me every time I take a step. So, on autopilot I grabbed an oven mitt from the utensil drawer, served up plates, yelled at Zach for throwing BBQ covered meatballs on the floor, washed Zach's face, nursed the baby and attacked the mound of dinner dishes. Through all of this I didn't once notice the pile of death in my kitchen drawer. It wasn't until I wiped down the counters and opened the drawer to put away the oven mitt that I saw it: It was a mouse. A dead mouse. A dead mouse lieing on a mound of cotton. A dead mouse lieing on a mound of cotton that had exploded out its backside because it ate a hole in my oven mitt.
I was livid. I bathed the babies, whom I had carried after wearing a mitt out of this drawer, threw away everything cotton out of that drawer (mitts, hot pads, etc.), scalded all the utensils, bleached out the drawer itself, and rushed to Wal Mart to buy more traps and poison.
I thought I had eliminated the evils vermin a month ago. It's on, Devil Mice. You, your children and your children's children will suffer my wrath. There will be no mercy and I will take no prisoners. It is ON.

On an equally unpleasant note, we will have a high of -5 on Sunday.

I want to go home and go to the beach.

I hate this state. Who decided to admit it to the Union anyway? Retards.

Thank you, childbirth

Upon looking at detailed clothing size charts I now realize why my clothes just don't seem to fit right.
I have a size 0 waist, size 2 hips, & (drum roll please) a flippin' size 8 bust!
That would explain why my fitted shirts are too short. Granted, I would look amazing in a swimsuit right now, but that doesn't really help me in Wyoming in December. I can't wait to stop breastfeeding!

Oh, Christmas Tree

Johnny and his dad braved the elements yesterday to go into the mountains and cut a Christmas tree. They certainly found a winner. It sits in my in-laws living room cheerily brightening the room and usurping the corner where the entire stuffed body of Igor, the very dead mountain sheep once occupied. Thank God.
I got to decorate the tree, which is one of my favorite parts of Christmas. We don't have a tree at our house this year because the last thing I need is an entire tree full of sticky sap and breakable baubles dangling right at Zachary's fingertips.
It's snowing today, and quite cold. I've felt overwhelmingly busy today and I still have to work on a Christmas present, fold laundry, cook dinner and go to the gym. I only have time to write now because I'm doing it one-handed while Gabriel nurses and Zach naps.
I've been able to snatch some time here and there to read a horrifying yet fascinating book. It's called "Infidel" and is written by Aayan Hirsi Ali. It describes her life growing up as a Muslim woman in Somalia, Saudi Arabia, and Kenya. It is not for the faint of heart. The most horrifying part is the detailed description of female circumcision and sewing. I nearly vomited. But this book will certainly make you appreciate being a Christian in America.
I have a surprise cooked up for Johnny next Friday. Can't wait!

He Does Not Come in Peace

As I sit bed, nursing Gabriel and recovering from Zach's first real tantrum, I recall Johnny's joking analysis of our oldest child's head size, "I come in peace!" It may be funny, but this morning it was certainly not true. Zach literally screamed for 20 minutes straight. Not only did he scream, he kicked, struggled, and thrashed around so much that he smacked his head on a stair. Why? Because I forbade him to play with the TV remote, he got angry and hit his brother, got spanked for hitting his brother and the drama began.

I am exhausted. Thank God for naptime.

On a happier note, the boys had wonderful check-ups yesterday. Although healthy as a horse, poor little Zachy only weighs 20 lbs. That lands him in the 3rd percentile for weight, but he landed a strapping 74th percentile for head size.
Gabriel grew 2 1/2" coming out to 22 inches. What a man! He also weighs 9 lbs. 13 oz. He's growing like a weed.

That's all for now...gotta grab a quick shower while the rascals nap.

Happy Thanksgiving!

I can't believe it's been 11 days since I've posted. Memories of the past two months are a complete blur, but such a lovely blur.

Thanksgiving arrives tomorrow, in all its glory. Thanksgiving has always been my favorite holiday. There is little commercialism and no gift-giving pressure. It is simply a time of family, fellowship, love, reflection, and a special moment set aside for the sole purpose of thanking God for His incredible blessings.

Mine are far too numerous to count, but I'll try to put down a few in a comprehensive list:

1) Salvation. The single greatest thing that ever happened to me brings me joy, comfort, and strength each day. Without Jesus as my Savior my life, beautiful as it is, would mean nothing.

2) Johnny. The 2nd greatest thing to ever happen to me. The Love of my Life is the greatest blessing God has ever bestowed. Johnny is the chocolate glaze to my gluten-free donut. ;-) I am blessed with something that seems truly rare these days: a happy, healthy, perfect marriage. Going on three years now. No, Johnny isn't perfect; but he's perfect for me.

3) My babies. Zachary and Gabriel are beautiful, healthy, sweet, and precocious. Those two angels are my world. Literally. My entire day is consumed with their love and care, but I wouldn't have it any other way.

4) Family. My families are loving and supportive. My mother-in-law constantly looks out for me, always wanting to be sure I'm healthy, happy, and fulfilled. She is a very willing babysitter and confidant. My mom drove all the way out to stay with me for 12 days when Gabriel was born. Her help was indispensable. I have too many family members to list just how wonderful they all are. Suffice to say they are true blessings.

5) My friends. Heather ranks as the clear #1. I can tell her anything and her phone calls are my beacon of light on gloomy days. Her radiant personality and wonderful stories never fail to brighten my most exhausting days. She is the picture of perfect friendship. I could write a novel on the wonderful friends Johnny and I have; they have supported and loved us through so much. I would list you all, but I'm afraid I would leave someone out, and I would hate to do that.

6) Montana. It appears that this incredible job offer will come through. It's still not 100% settled, but it's close.

7) Health. My health is better than it's ever been. I'm dutiful with my diet and vitamins, and I can control my exercise compulsion now. Breast-feeding makes weight maintenance difficult, but I'm doing my best. Aside from weariness from late-night feedings, I look and feel the healthiest I have since early high school. Celiac, anorexia, and compulsive exercising seem sufficiently whipped.

The list could go on forever, but I haven't the time or words to write it all out. Suffice to say that God is so good. Give thanks with a grateful heart; give thanks to the Holy One.

Well, it's been a little while since I've updated, but there really isn't much to tell. Gabriel stays awake more these days so the minutes I once had to myself have diminished considerably. Both boys are happy and healthy and keep me busy from morning to night.

I got a gym membership and have been gradually get back into a respectable workout routine. It feels so good to exercise and stretch again. I'm getting close to a straddle split again. I've also made it back into my size 0 jeans; all in all not bad progress for 6 weeks post-delivery.

The financing came through for the Montana project!!! We are so excited. We expect the land deal to come through by the 1st of January and we will most likely move to Butte, MT in February. We'll continue to rent until sometime around August, at which time our cabin is projected to be finished. I hope to be all settled in just in time to give Zachary a nice 2nd birthday bash. But that's quite a ways into the future. I have enough trouble keeping the present organized.

Johnny began teaching dance lessons this week. He's so amazing. He works all day and then teaches dance a couple hours in the evenings and still finds time to be the best husband and father there is. And, dang, is he good looking.

Today consisted of Wal Mart, Health Food Store, and a trip to the inlaws. The Gators are kicking serious South Carolina butt, and Johnny only has one dance lesson today. A fairly successful day, I must say.

Don't Blink

Time is shooting by way too fast!!! My tiny baby is already five weeks old and Zachary walked up a stair today, not crawled, walked.

I thought I had just posted a couple days ago, but it's been nearly a week already. I've been too busy to realize that the days slip through my fingers so quickly.

Watching my little angels grow is truly a mixed blessing. It's beautiful to see them mature and develop and become individuals, but I don't want my babies to be boys just yet. But grow they do, and I can't slow them down. They're still babies and I'm already getting choked up. How am I going to be the day the leave for college? Yikes.

Gabriel had his 1-month checkup on Monday and he's in the pink of health. He gained three lbs. and an inch. He is perfectly precious.

It's snowing again. Icky, icky.

Snakes and Snails and Puppy Dog Tails

My little boy is all boy. He loves dirt, juice, and throwing hard objects at fragile items. And, of course, Mac and Cheese. I'm excited for Christmas, because I have a wonderful gift picked out for my two little men. The littler of said men will not care right away, but give him a few months. Nope, you won't pry it out of me; wait for the pictures.

We have a Halloween Party to attend Saturday night at Johnny's ballroom. We just decided on our costumes this evening. Johnny's will be very funny.

Our house is removed from any neighborhoods, so we don't expect any Trick or Treaters. That makes me sad; I love to see the costumes. As an alternative we'll head over and have dinner and candy with Grandma, then we'll hole up in her basement and watch a scary movie. Halloween is the first holiday I spent with Johnny. We weren't quite together yet, but we were already best friends. That Halloween brings back fond and not-so-fond memories. One involves a punched wall and another a party cut short by Heather dramatics (I wonder if you remember that one, Heather, dear ;). Good times. This is our 4th Halloween together.

We made a glorious discovering yesterday! A small, locally owned supermarket in town has a huge gluten free section!! I couldn't believe my eyes. I wanted to buy everything, but GF food is like gold, so I had to select three items. But it's nice to know that Heaven is just down the street. :)

My little ones sleep and my big one visits the gym. So I am enjoying a little solitude while I wait for my Love to get home. Although I never like to be away from Johnny, this alone time is welcome. I didn't have one moment of quiet time today, because Zachary and Gabriel timed their sleep and wakefulness just so.

Goodnight, sleep tight!

Sleep!!

Gabriel slept 8 hours last night!!! Sleep, glorious sleep. It's so nice to get in a full sleep cycle. I feel so rested; it's incredible. The only problem with him sleeping so long is that I get about 4-5 oz. of milk in each breast and that HURTS!!!! It's just not cool to wake up drenched in milk. Yuck.

Zachary also slept through the night. He had been for sleeping like a champ since he was two months old, but he stopped around 9 months and seems to finally be getting on track. I think it's because he started popping out the really painful teeth: molars and cuspids. But the cuspid he was working on popped through a couple days ago and he's been an angel ever since.

The leaves are cascading off the trees, the weather is getting colder, and the air is getting crisper. We have a freezer full of deer and a space heater for Zach's room. Winter, do your worst.

Ok, really, please don't. I'm just saying we're ready...

A Navel Idea

Zachary made an astounding discovery yesterday; he found his belly button. We poked it and said, "boop" and now every time someone says "boop" he lifts his shirt. He is very proud of his belly button. He has also accomplished the great feat of climbing onto the couch unassisted. This speaks of future horrors for the upholstery.

I remember why I decided never to argue politics or religion over facebook. It's so completely fruitless. Who are you going to convince on Facebook? And if you stand no chance of making a difference, why argue? It only causes unneeded stress. So, I now reinstate my vow and apologize to the Facebook gods for breaking my oath.
In further retrospect, why would I argue with a liberal at all? They've proven time and again that they can't think, anyway. So pointless.

Finally got a picture of Gabriel smiling! Well, sort of...it's more of the Harrison Ford side-smirk, but it counts, ok?

I had the worst headache I've had in ages last night. It's still lingering, but now it's bearable. Waking up with a headache kills the whole day. Even Advil at 2 am didn't cure it, but my wonderful husband got me a Dr. Pepper before he went to work and the caffeine helped a lot.

Last night we ate deer that Johnny shot and butchered himself. What a man! :) It was delicious, but I remember why I don't eat red meat. Ugh. So sad.

We have a very important dinner tomorrow night. I'm very excited!!

Growing Up

Johnny and I had a great talk last night; we hashed some things out and made some promises. There's nothing quite as satisfying as a good, long, serious talk with your best friend. Nothing makes you grow and mature quite as much as a solid commitment. My marriage just gets happier with each passing day. I'm so in love and so blessed.

My boys are growing at an alarming rate! Zachary has sprung up at least an inch this month. The little weasel can reach onto table tops now, and, subsequently, reach whatever is on said table tops. Gabriel is almost kind of starting to fill out his newborn sleepers. He's still swimming in them, but he can poke his hands out now, and stretch his feet into the legs without getting lost. He fills out his preemie sleeper and has advanced to newborn size diapers.

Those two are so different. Zachary is the mischievious one. He has a twinkle in his eye that lets you know he's up to something big and he's always off on an adventure. Zach would be the happiest kid in the world if he could be outside all the time.
Although it's a little early to say for sure, Gabriel seems to be the quiet one. He is very serious and thoughtful. His little face tells you he's working through something big. He seems to be such a gentle little soul.

Excitement is brewing on the job front, but that's all I'll say for now. :)

My brain is still pretty fried from pregnancy. It's amazing how scattered one becomes; I blame the hormones. I have to keep a daily "to do" list just to make sure I complete necessary tasks, like ironing Johnny's shirts or taking out the trash. Honestly, I even have to write down who I owe phone calls.

Heather's dream story from a couple nights ago was one of the best I've heard in a while. Still chuckling over that one. Now there's another best friend who's talks mean everything to me. A phone call from Heather is always a highlight of the day. I wish I had more time to talk to her!

And I know I just said "another best friend." There's a big difference between husband-best-friend and girl-best-friend. They are both my best friend and I'm sticking to that! :)

I need to start another blog for political rants. This socialistic mess is getting out of hand.

Nothin' to Do But Smile

Another happy and uneventful day. Zachary had a great day; he even tried to share his peanut butter cracker with Gabriel. We had lunch with Daddy at the ever-classy Micky D's and spent the afternoon addressing birth announcement envelopes.

Gabriel smiled at me tonight! He's smiled before, but completely randomly. Tonight he responded to my smile and his name with a big grin of his own. He's such a little doll.

I put Gabriel's birth announcement up on the refrigerator next to Zachary's and it's unbelievable how alike they look. Gabriel's complexion is quite a bit darker, but they both have big, blue eyes, a dimple in the chin, the same nose, and perfect little faces. And people still think they're both girls. They're just too pretty to be boys. :)

Simplicity

I look over my blog sometimes and feel inept. My writing style is very simple, almost juvenile. I wish I could write beautiful prose, posts that inspire and warm the heart. I wish I could write like Stewie, but if I tried it would seem forced and pretentious. So, I will simply write like myself, simple, sweet, and, at times, childish. That's me; take it or leave it.

Honestly, my whole life is pretty simple. Today, for example, I felt very accomplished as I tucked my babies into bed and lay back with a mug of hot chocolate, collecting my thoughts. No, I wasn't involved in any big business deals; I didn't save lives; I didn't even drive a car today. But I did laundry, made some phone calls, washed my hair, cooked dinner, and cut up apple and hot dog into bite-sized pieces. Golly, I even took out the garbage. But, best of all, I woke up beside the man I love and kissed my babies goodnight.

Yes, I lead a simple life, but it's beautiful. I wouldn't trade it for the world. God is truly great.

Godsends

He answers prayer. I've prayed and hoped for the perfect job, and we've waited through very difficult times, knowing that this is just a stepping stone. We've reconciled to living in Sheridan, WY, keeping the faith that God has a spot for us and, for now, this is it.

Johnny had planned on applying to more jobs sometime this winter, thinking that nothing would turn up for a few months and we could have a better job and move on by late Spring. All that seems to have changed.

It all started with babies. Babies, you see, require lots of equipment, particularly when traveling over night. Along with bags for clothes and such, one has to pack strollers, beds and bedding, car seats, and toys. Our cute little Yaris just doesn't have that capacity. So, Johnny headed over to the Toyota dealer to get us a bigger vehicle. We expected to be treated well and receive a good deal. We did not expect to get handed a dream job. But that's what happened.

This dream job was offered by a Montana venture capitalist cowboy who happens to hail from a wealthy family from Lexington, KY. The man has led one of the most fascinating and fulfilling lives I've ever heard of. Just as an example, the first horse he ever rode was the 1958 Kentucky Derby winner. He has walked the Sahara Desert, ridden broncos in the rodeos, and run a charity to benefit cancer patients. And now he wants to open a resort in Montana and wants Johnny to be his Operations Manager.

The job has been offered, but details are still a little up in the air. At the moment we're just trying to figure out if this actually happened or if we dreamed it. The perks with this job are unreal.

Details to come. Praise the Lord!

Beautiful Gabriel

He's here! My beautiful little boy was born on October 1st at 6:59 pm. He was 5 lbs., 7 oz. and is just perfect.
Zachary is coping decently well. I think it would be much easier if I were allowed to pick him up, but I'm not supposed to lift anything heavier than little Gabe. So showing Zach that he's still my little man is a lot more difficult when he reaches for me and I can't hold him. :( Usually I end up sitting on the floor and letting him crawl into my lap.

Recovery has been incredibly fast. I'm already down to a size 4 and hope to be back to my old size in just a couple weeks. I haven't even started exercising yet.

Johnny is amazing.

Here's the new little angel:

Stick a Fork in Me

I'm done with this nonsense.

It's been a long day of pain and contractions, which culminated into two hours at the hospital and no baby. I have no idea how to gauge whether or not this baby is actually popping out. I guess I'm just going to wait through all this intense pain and just go in when/if my water breaks. I don't even care at this point if I end up with a "Fruit of the Loom Baby," as a nurse termed it. Think about it...

So, Gators lose, Seminoles win, and I spend two hours in the hospital...pretty lame day, overall.

Rehab

I'm going off drugs!! I just took my last dose of Procardia and tomorrow we will reach "full term." This is a stunning accomplishment, one for which we are very thankful. Thanks to everyone for the prayers.

So, given the facts that we didn't expect to make it this far, that I've been having every pre-labor symptom in the book, and I have finished my labor-preventing medication, don't be surprised if I disappear completely from the radar in the next couple days.

Arachnophobia

I have killed three large spiders in the last twelve hours, not counting the imaginary dream spider that woke me up last night and scared Johnny out of his wits by making me scream. The primary trouble with old houses is the vermin. I would rather have mice than spiders, but I would rather have spiders than bedbugs. Too bad it's not up to me.


Last night was mostly sleepless due to contractions. I went to the doctor today in great pain and was sent home with no progress. That's fine with me; I really don't want to have a baby after a sleepless night. I blame the Chinese and their hidden gluten! Something I ate at the buffet last night must have contained that evil protein and set off the contractions. I've been banished to bed for the afternoon in hopes of easing the terrible pressure that Baby's head is putting on my hips.


We've been looking at job opportunities in Britain and Australia. The hope is to leave the United Socialist States of America before they close the borders. It's sad when England is a breath away from being economically freer than America. The actions of the past couple days have spelled the greatest nationalization project in the history of the world. Impressive, Comrade Bush.


Dinner with the inlaws tonight, then, maybe, some sleep.

Paved with False Love

John introduced me to a series of mini-stories produced by The Drew Cary Project. They are hosted by reason.tv and aim to uncover liberal-leaning, big government-loving projects for the evil shams that they are.

The most infuriating of these stories told about a 17-year-old, high school athlete who lost his leg to bone cancer. The phantom pains were unbearable for him until his doctor (Stanford renowned, mind you) prescribed medical marijuana. This boy had been on heavy narcotics for weeks in an attempt to ease the intense pain of his amputation, but all they served to do was turn him into a drone who could do little more than sleep.

The pharmacist who provided the prescription for this young man often gave him the doses for free after hearing the heart-wrenching story. The man's kindness and provision of this controversial prescription eased the boy's pain without drugging him into oblivion. This kid's life could finally start again.

The DEA, god of the universe, disagreed. They raided the pharmacist, took all his supplies, and put him in jail with a $400,000 bail, which his family scraped together. This man is now under house arrest and faces felony charges.

This simple plant, harvested and used medicinally and recreationally for thousands of years, is somehow regarded as the bane of existence. Its evils are touted as destructive to the very core of American values. Even a 17-year-old suffering from horrendous pain cannot use it to ease his agony, despite the prescription of a respected physician. And yet, somehow, it is acceptable to diagnose an energetic 8-year-old with "ADD" and dope him up on speed for his entire childhood.

I struggle to comprehend how this mindset even comes about. They say, "the path to hell is paved with good intentions," but it seems far more sinister than that. I don't understand how something so horribly illogical and blatantly evil can become commonplace thinking in society. At least with other horrific vices in this country, like abortion, you can find a motive. A situation like that of medical marijuana makes no sense. It is difficult to see who benefits or who can even conceive of being nosy enough to tell a suffering, desperate patient that they can't take a small, controlled dosage of a plant to ease their pain. How dare anyone be so noble?

I just finished re-reading C.S. Lewis' classic "Till We Have Faces," and I believe I can find an answer to my conundrum in this great novel. Orual, Queen of Glome, destroys her sister's life by forcing her to disobey her husband. Orual convinced herself that she did this for Psyche's own good, that her action was done in the name of love for her sister. Orual later discovers and admits to herself that her idea of love was exactly the opposite. Really, her motivation came from selfishness, jealousy, and the idea that she was wiser and more knowledgeable than her innocent sister. These sentiments allowed her to manipulate in the worst possibly way; she used the name of love to control another.

That is what the bleeding hearts of today do. They spout gospels of love, peace, and joy for all, living out their selfish existence in any way they choose. It is not love that motivates them, but a desire to control, to feel empowered and noble. They profane the name of love and manipulate the innocent. This selfishness is, perhaps, the greatest evil of all and is destroying our nation.

I ask myself over and over the classic Libertarian question: Why can't we just leave each other alone?

Simple: It would not stroke our egos, and that will never do.

White Trash

I just realized how amazingly like trailer trash I looked walking the short distance from Johnny's office to the nearby health food store. I was 36 weeks pregnant, carrying my barefoot toddler, not fantastically dressed, on foot, with a huge bruise on my left arm. All I really needed was a can of Bud Light and a cig. Hotness.

Safe!

Zach naps and I seek refuge from the world in general by lounging in bed, taking solace from a gluten-free doughnut.

The doctor officially declared us in the safety zone today. We've made it to 36 weeks. They would really like to see us make it to 37, but times are hard; we take what we can get. The only concern today is with Gabriel's size. My belly hasn't grown at all since the ultrasound a couple weeks ago. They scheduled another size-check ultrasound for Friday, and if Baby Boy shows no signs of growth they will induce labor and rescue him from my depleting resources. It didn't help my case that I had lost a couple pounds. Don't ask me how; I had a frosty and fries last night and a doughnut this morning in an effort to boost my weight. It seems when I eat a decent amount I actually lose weight.
The nurse taking my blood pressure commented laughingly that it looked like Johnny and I were having "problems." I have a huge bruise gracing my entire left forearm where a well-meaning nurse abused it on Friday at the hospital. What can I say? Gotta keep the wife in line...

I miss Heather! I only got to talk to her for about half an hour last night, and that's not nearly enough. I really hope I can visit soon.

That's about all the news here. Cheers!

Back in the Saddle

Wow, my last post was fabulously angsty. Technically, life has become a little more difficult since then, but it really doesn't matter, because Johnny is home. Although, the poor guy had to high-tail it back to meet me in the hospital...

Zachary's disposition had improved by leaps and bounds. He's definitely been on a growth spurt. He's been eating like a little piggie and he's back to sleeping long naps and snoozing for 10-12 hours/night. He's been babbling up a storm and getting into everything he can possibly grab.

Zachary's little brother is now causing the trouble maker. I had contractions all afternoon on Friday and went in around 4pm to get checked. It turned out that I had dilated another 2 1/2 cm since my appointment two days before. They flipped out, shot me up with Terbutaline, and sent me to the hospital, where I would have passed out from my reaction to that drug had it not been for the thoughtful CNA who rushed me to a bed. My contractions wouldn't stop, so they started me on a water/glucose IV, which involved a nurse probing in my arm with a needle until it bruised and she moved on to torture my other arm. Only a couple hours after the shot they gave me a pill of the same drug and another pill of Procardia. Things finally settled down and we were able to go home for the night. I was so drugged up that I could barely walk. Little Gabriel was not pleased; he spent the niext couple hours kicking up a storm.

Now, I am still drugged up, getting painful, crampy, half-contractions all day, and not allowed to take even a short walk. Just have to get through another week and a half! We can do this.

I have now caught 5 mice. There are 5 little mouse bodies in the outside garbage can. We are infested. The landlords are going to have to call an exterminator. Although I am proud of my mice-catching abilities, they really need to go.

Tomorrow is Cleaning Day. Unfortunately, I'm not allowed to vaccum, so all I can do is tidy, clean the bathroom, and do laundry. I'll also get my grocery shopping in. Zach loves Wal Mart. Busy day tomorrow.

To Sum Up My Day:

I'm terribly lonely, feel like my water will break any second, flowing with ridiculously emotional hormones, dealing with a molar teething toddler, and spending my day killing insects and arachnids and cleaning up mouse poop....completely and utterly alone.

I would cry if I thought it would help. But anyone who might help is miles and miles away. The closest family member is two hours away and my closest friends are on the other side of the country.


I want to go home.

Remorse

I caught a mouse!!! I did it; I exacted revenge on the evil rice cake marauders. Yet, I don't feel as fulfilled as I expected. 'Tis the nature of revenge, I suppose.

We learned that we don't just have mice; we're infested. I put out two boxes of D-Con and they were both empty after one night. However, my trap-placing strategy was poor, so I caught no actual bodies. So, I revamped my attack and this morning I was rewarded with a full trap. I went to check said trap before putting in my contact lenses, so all I saw was a blob in a sprung trap. I dashed into the bathroom, where Johnny was showering, and announced my triumph. I put in my contacts and rushed back to revel in the glory of my hunting prowess. Unfortunately, closer examination revealed the crushed body of a small, furry, stiff rodent. The pregnancy hormone roller-coaster took off, and Johnny, in his ever-calming sympathy, got a good laugh out of the situation.

My doctor visit this morning went well. I haven't progressed anymore, but Gabriel is about as far down as he can be without being in the birth canal. Basically, as soon as I dilate to 10 cm that baby will shoot out like a bullet. I'm just praying I don't pop my hip out of place again. A constant click when I walk warns that the danger is imminent.

Johnny left for Laramie about an hour ago. He has to meet and greet colleagues down there (i.e. schmooze). His business obligations end Friday, but he's considering staying through Saturday to go to a football game and hang out with Mike. I miss him already!! And I really hate sleeping alone. I hope these three days go by fast, but I know they won't. To paraphrase the great Chris Trapper, "a day without him is like a day without music."

Murderous Desires

I've been driven to this. It really isn't in my nature to actively wish death on such a seemingly helpless creature. But they've done it; they've appealed to my sense of poetic justice.

First, it was the scattered sunflower seed shells and poo strewn in my silverware drawer. Then, the little vermin dared to get into my chocolate. Just when I thought they couldn't get stupider than eating a pregnant woman's chocolate supply, they delved into said Mama Bear's special treat for Zach. They chewed through the unopened bag of rice cakes and ate half and pooped on the rest. They ate Zachary's favorite snack!!! And I didn't buy more today because I thought he had a full bag for this week.

Well, it's over now. The mice will die. I have set traps smeared with peanut butter and scattered poison throughout their favorite hangouts. Chew on that, evil rodents!!!

Face plant

We had an ultrasound today to check on Gabriel's growth. He's a touch on the small side, but his heartbeat and breathing are great and his growth is consistent. I'll get check on my dilating status next week, but they didn't want to risk stripping the membranes any further this week. Next week they would not stop Baby from coming if he decides to make his appearance. And he could decide any day; his face is planted at the opening. It looks like he's trying to peek out. They couldn't even get a picture of his face because he was too far down. Basically, when I dilate to 10 cm, that boy will be outta there.

I was very impressed with Sarah Palin's speech. She was classy, funny, and to the point. If she were running for president, I would probably vote for her. Unfortunately, I must remind everyone that McCain is actually the presidential candidate and Palin is merely the VP. The VP really doesn't hold much sway when all is said and done. The real plus side would be preparation for presidency for her. Still, I just can't vote for Mr. Big-Government. I'm still a conservative.

I'm praying Zachary sleeps tonight. He was up almost the entire night last night and I only made it through today by taking a nap when he did. My poor little man is cutting molars. :(

Have I mentioned lately that Johnny is amazing?

Just A Housewife

At first the inclusion of a sweet, smart, pretty, classy, Christian mother of five seemed to be a boon to the McCain ticket. How could any one fail to admire what this charismatic young Governor Sarah Palin has accomplished?

However, the media has wasted little time in turning the girl-next-door into just another piece of white trash. That's right, the saint-like accomplishment of raising five children has been slanted into trailor trash; the sweet purity has been smeared as simplicity, and Sarah Palin has been quickly labeled "just a housewife."

"Just a housewife..." I would like to see one of those so-called "ballsy" career women attempt one day of being an organized stay-at-home mom. I'd like to see their pretty little pumps and cute tailored skirts survive the rigors of just one 24-hour period caring for a home, husband, and children.

I've always taken pride at being "barefoot, in the kitchen, pregnant." You see, such a title does not make me trailer trash; it lifts me into the elite category of women who not only "have it all," but do it all, for everybody, every day of their lives.

Shall we review the list of duties a housewife is expected to accomplish, with minimal training, with the expertise and patience of a trained professional?

House-cleaner, nutritionist, cook, nurse, fix-it man, errand girl, chauffeur, laundress, teacher, psychologist, psychic, diplomat, negotiator, accountant, companion/lover, event planner, interior decorator, confidant, gardener, cheerleader, coach, caterer, hostess, and customer service representative.

All of these jobs are to be performed without pay, with little gratitude, and the worst hours imaginable. All the while, the housewife is expected to smile, encourage, and show complete love and patience to all the members of her family. And what's the cost of a mistake on the job? Messed-up kids, domestic unrest, maybe even divorce.

Now I'm not trying to set myself up as a saint; I am merely trying to demonstrate the fact that any disdain shown to a homemaker is not only grossly unfounded, but inexcusably ignorant. It is an exceedingly difficult job and one that few can pull off with grace.

Sarah Palin's accomplishment are, at the very least, applaudable. At most, she is an extraordinary woman embarking on a near impossible quest. Already she is being slandered by men who are intimidated by a confident woman and women who would never have the cahunas to be "just a housewife."

It's appalling that the bravest women in America are discounted as uncredible, but such women have the class to rise above that criticism. We may not be out earning 6-figure paychecks, conquering the working world, or even attempting to effeminize men, but we're staying very busy. And, if I do say so myself, we're doing a pretty bang-up job.

Here's to the housewife, may you continue to be "just" that.

Conceivable

I just received conception advice from an old woman in a convenience store....I didn't know what to do. I just thanked her and fled. Oh, Sheridan.

It all started with a birthday. Well, I guess technically you could say it started back in January, but we won't go there...
Zachary is staying with Grandma tonight so Johnny and I can spend time together for his birthday. Courtesy of a gift from my parents I took Johnny out on the town (a.k.a. the classy Centennial movie theatre). On our way back from seeing "Tropic Thunder" we decided to dose up on caffeine at the Loaf n' Jug close to our house. As we approached the check out the charming older cashier, whom I can only describe as typically Sheridanese, asked me when I was due. I informed her with a smile that we were due in 6 weeks.
"Looks like a girl," she casually informed me. Apparently my belly looks feminine.
"No," I mourned. "It's my second boy."
"Oh, well I had three boys before my girl," she assured me. I smiled, encouraged, and turn to leave, but she stopped us with this sage interjection:
"You have to make sure your temperature is up...High temperature kills the male sperm."
Johnny's mouth hit the floor and I believe I stammered something to the effect of "good to know," while the man in line behind us unabashedly guffawed.... I'm really not sure, it's all a blur until we reached the safety of our car.

Seriously, what do you say to that?

Guess I'll have to work on bringing up my temperature....

Ladies' Man

Zachary is an all-star! The doctor's words, not mine. Although very, very puny, his development is excellent and his health is superb. He's a champ. He was very pleased to show off his new walking skills to the nurses and receptionist. The receptionist even followed us back to his room to play with him. What a lady-killer. Not only did he charm the entire office staff, he won the hearts of every lady at US Bank, and delightedly waved to people from Daddy's second floor office window.

I waited to take my medicine until about half an hour ago. I'm too afraid to drive while I'm on it. Procardia lowers blood pressure, and since mine is already freakishly low, I get terrible headaches, dizzy spells, and nausea. So, I suffered through contractions most of the morning, but it was a delight to spend a morning being able to focus on life in general. I hope I can make it through two weeks on this stuff.

The mice had the audacity to eat my chocolate!! Even mice should know better than to mess with a pregnant woman's chocolate stash. This is war, people.

Cake Week

The birthday season has begun!! We kicked off the week with Grandmommy on 8/25. Today is my mother-in-law's 54th birthday. Zachary will celebrate his first big day on Sunday, followed directly after by Johnny's on Labor Day. Mike's 21st bash is on the 4th, but, alas, he is back to Laramie for school, so no big party with him.

Johnny's facebook status says it all. "Wowza, what a busy week!" Cousin Andy just left after taking us out for breakfast. Such a sweet guy. He's headed back to Wisconsin for school. Peter comes into town this afternoon and we are scheduled to have a birthday dinner tonight. I have to remember Zachary's 12 month check up on Friday morning. Plus, the week didn't exactly get off to a relaxing start, considering baby troubles and doctor visits.

Monday night we headed up to the hospital to pre-register with Obstetrics. I love that system, because it means when I actually do go into labor all I have to think about is pushing a watermelon out my down-town, not signing medical papers. Unfortunately, that night also brought on whopper contractions. They were so bad I thought I was going into labor. But after three hours they settled down and I was able to sleep.

Tuesday morning I got in trouble at my checkup for losing 2 lbs. and was put on Procardia to stop my endless stream of contractions. I also have to get an extra ultrasound to check on Baby's size since my tummy isn't growing.

But amidst the turmoil of this week, my son gave me a moment to pause and just revel in the joy of motherhood. He walked up to me, rested his head on my leg, and sighed, "mama." I could melt. What an angel.

Is anyone else stoked for football season?? First Gator game on Saturday!!! Woo-hoo!!

Tiny Package, Priceless Gift

There is nothing more beautiful than having your little one rest his head on your shoulder and dry his tears. He knows that Mommy will never let anything hurt him. His trust is my greatest treasure. Sweet dreams, Little Angel.

Hey, Jude

My son's favorite word is "hey." He uses it a good 5 dozen times throughout the day, not only to get attention, point out objects of interest, and assume command, but also to express indignation. Today he used it to inform me that he took offense to me unceremoniously picking him up and peeking in his diaper to check for poo.

Gabriel is still a-cookin' but we don't know how long that will last. I have many contractions throughout the day and a lot of pain and pressure.

Ryan visits this weekend!! Yay!!

So happy for Heather and very proud to have found a dress that meets her selective approval. ;) I'm hoping and praying that everything works out beautifully for her. And who wouldn't I kill to be able to visit her in NYC!!

Johnny is sitting beside me playing a computer game. It might be pathetic, but I'm happy just to be near him; it doesn't matter if he's left the known world for his own happy universe. I love to just be able to reach over and rub his back. He's so amazing.

I would really love to perform in a musical right now. Unfortunately, my diaphram is completely squished and I am way too fat to dance.

Is it bad that the highlight of my day was going to Wal Mart?

Here We Go Again

I went for my bi-weekly doctor check-up today. I had promised Johnny that I would have them check to see if I was dilating at all. I wasn't too worried, because not only was I the textbook perfect preggo at my last appointment, but I was confident in my old pro labor and delivery status. I would *know* if there was trouble. But, like the sweet, indulgent little wife I am, I asked them to check.
Before I knew it, I had been down-graded from "textbook" to "scary." Not only did I have two contractions in the time it took the doctor to measure my fundal height, I was also 4 weeks behind in belly size, hadn't grown at all since my last appointment, putting me at risk for an under-sized baby. So, the doctor already had sentenced me to weekly appointments from now on to watch the baby's size.
As if that wasn't enough, my pelvic exam showed that I am 70% effaced and about 1 cm dilated. I had to get a test done to make sure I wasn't going into active labor and I've been condemmed to "take it easy" for the next 5 weeks.

I thought I was doing so well this time.

Oh, yeah, and the doctor gave me instructions to avoid "intercourse" in about the most awkward way I have ever heard a doctor refer to sex. Wow...I think my suppressed laughter may have led to those contractions...

Living Large

My husband is my hero. It seems the longer we're together the more difficult it is to be apart. Johnny returned from his seminar in Cheyenne yesterday evening and I felt like I could breath again. We haven't even been married three years yet and five days of separation is like living a nightmare. What will it be like in 20 years? I hope to never find out.

Zachary spent dinnertime chewing on the table. The poor little bugger is cutting his canines. I doped him up on Motrin right before he went to bed and he went to sleep easily. I pray that he will get some rest and relief tonight.

Being pregnant for the majority of 2 years really gives new meaning to the term "living large." Last month I, once again, packed away my cute little size 1 GAP jeans in favor of the ever-flattering Motherhood Maternity elastic waistband. Fortunately, the juniors section of Wal-Mart abounds with the news style of blouse that looks made for big, fat preggos like me, so I can remain somewhat trendy.

2 months until little Gabriel is due!! We bought a changing table with shelves today and I was finally able to begin organizing the nursery. I dug out the tiny 0-3 month sizes in preparation for Boy #2. Zachary did not seem pleased, but I'm not sure he even realizes why he wouldn't be.

Just Another Day in Paradise

I love to vent in writing. It's wonderful. It forces all the goop out of my scrambled brain and into a semi-coherent format. Such a purging of the mind always leaves me feeling refreshed and re-focused. With this knowledge in hand I decided today would be a perfect day to start a new blog.
It just so happens that today was a perfectly rotten day. Normally I just love my life as little Susie homemaker, prancing around barefoot-in-the-kitchen-pregnant, but today, between the scraping, screaming, whining, idiocy that went on around me, the homemaker life didn't quite cut it. Even I could go for a vodka cranberry right about now.
The awfulness started with the fact that my amazing husband, Johnny, left at 8 am for a week long seminar in Cheyenne, WY. I already miss him terribly and it's just the first day of a very long five.
Awfulness #2: We just moved into a new house (a rental) and it was decided that on the day we moved in the owners wanted the trimming around the windows painted. The painter was to keep his supplies locked in our storage she while he worked. We thought that was fine; it would take us a couple days to settle and we wouldn't need the shed until we were all sorted out anyway. We figured such a simple job on such a small home could not possibly take more than 3 days. Two weeks later the man has not finished painting. He arrived at 7:30 this morning, opened all the windows, left them open all day, woke Zach from his afternoon nap by scraping the paint off the glass where he had done an exceptionally shoddy job, and tramped mud across my freshly mopped floor on his way to get a window open. I arrived home from dinner with my inlaws to find the windows not only left open for all the bugs to fly in, but also painted securely in place. I had to interrupt my father-in-laws evening to come and shut them for me. It took him nearly half an hour since he had to cut the windows free.
So now my house is infested with bugs, my son is throwing his second lack-of-sleep tantrum of the evening and won't drop off to sleep, and I'm alone for the night in a very creeky house.

Oh yeah, and I'm over seven months pregnant.

Life is dandy.

No, it really is...I just have to get through the rest of this week alive.